To be completely honest, I’m really not in a situation where I should be spending time making videos. Ashleigh and I just had a baby and I work more than 65 hours a week at a job I don’t make enough at because it’s commission pay. Which creates a vicious cycle of working as much as I can, wearing myself out and not being around enough as a father, and (being it’s less important should go without saying) as a content creator. I’m working on changing the job issue into something that works with making videos as well as (more importantly) spending time with my family.
I don’t want to disappoint you. And I’m not saying that in a patronising “duh, why don’t you get it” way. I mean it pisses me off every day where I don’t get back into building my channels because I know there are people that like them. I still get nice comments on them from random people, I still get messages like yours indicating people are waiting or even trying to figure out why I’m not, and from my own creative perspective I want to be doing it.
I just can’t right now. That’s why the Patreon campaign exists, might I add. I’m trying to alleviate some of the financial pressure I’m under.
The thing that pisses me off, I know making videos means making money. But it’s not immediate money; I get paid after like 60 days. That’s a really long time when you have a baby. Even if I had a viral hit tomorrow it’d be two months before it helped me any. This isn’t complaining, either.
I will be back. It just needs to happen the right way. I am pretty tired of the false starts, as I’m sure is anyone who cares. I make a video, get really jazzed for it, then it’s the only one for months. That pisses me off more than you can imagine. It’s really hard juggling all this stuff though. I can’t physically continue at the pace I’m working at though. That’s making a different job plus YouTube more and more necessary anyway. It just had to be right, when it happens it has to be consistent or it’s worthless.
That’s what I’m nervous about. Traffic can be generated, audiences can be found. I’m pretty good at getting people in, whether they like me or not. Sometimes the people who don’t like me are more useful than they think. I think they can be overcome. I don’t think being dead tired and not having any time can be. That has to be completely changed. I am working on it though.